no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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