I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
