I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
