Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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