I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize