Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
