So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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