There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
