oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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