That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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