I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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