i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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