somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
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Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
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Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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