i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
