So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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