I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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