For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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