the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
