My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize
