yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize