Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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