I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?