He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
