Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
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