Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
