I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
