like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
