I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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