I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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