Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
NoShamevember. You game?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
