I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
