Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab

(253): View more from Washington

I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge

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(517): View more from Michigan

last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(937): View more from Ohio

you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.

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(848): View more from New Jersey

it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away

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(646): View more from New York

vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic

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(213): View more from California

WTF DUDE?

(323): View more from California

Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this

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(512): View more from Texas

Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.

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