R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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