Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
