Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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