He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
