How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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