D3 body, D1 cock
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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