so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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