I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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