Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
