:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize