Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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