Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.