Texts From Last Night

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  (904): View more from Florida

  I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.

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  (904): I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom. http://tfl.nu/lxr2
  Replies (18) Good night (1198) Bad night (642) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain

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  (925): You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain http://tfl.nu/anwf
  Replies (16) Good night (2599) Bad night (706) Order T-Shirt
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.

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  (765): After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself. http://tfl.nu/i4wo
  Replies (14) Good night (1639) Bad night (5610)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.

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  (716): I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together. http://tfl.nu/l7kg
  Replies (34) Good night (3003) Bad night (9715) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.

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  (403): while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see. http://tfl.nu/6p31
  Replies (4) Good night (2927) Bad night (923) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Maybe I should forgo underwear.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  This is a family BBQ no?

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  (214): Maybe I should forgo underwear. (314): This is a family BBQ no? http://tfl.nu/2i6y
  Replies (4) Good night (2121) Bad night (1068)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"

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  (850): Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere" http://tfl.nu/ju0a
  Replies (9) Good night (3317) Bad night (811) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many

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  (515): Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many http://tfl.nu/90pg
  Replies (2) Good night (1597) Bad night (430) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  What can I say, I'm a giver.

  (1-608): View more from Wisconsin

  Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.

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  (608): What can I say, I'm a giver. (1-608): Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian. http://tfl.nu/c94l
  Replies (11) Good night (1862) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN

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  (301): Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN http://tfl.nu/2m0y
  Replies (17) Good night (1893) Bad night (626) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding

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  (503): We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding http://tfl.nu/3uk9
  Replies (8) Good night (542) Bad night (1497) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now

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  (423): So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now http://tfl.nu/44f0
  Replies (13) Good night (383) Bad night (1012) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.

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  (202): Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice. http://tfl.nu/it26
  Replies (9) Good night (344) Bad night (2370) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole

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  (720): Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole http://tfl.nu/mr1r
  Replies (3) Good night (415) Bad night (169) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.

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  (860): he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE. http://tfl.nu/wid5
  Replies (5) Good night (763) Bad night (157) Order T-Shirt

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