Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
ttyl tear gas
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.