ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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