You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize