What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
