Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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