I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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