just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
My vagina just clenched in fear
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
